Recognising the structure of a bullying group

There are teasing and bullying teams.
Teasing and bullying are group activities.
Teasing is spontaneous behaviour, goes back and forth, is sometimes not fun,
but has a social learning effect.
Bullying is different.
In bullying behaviour, a group targets one person for an extended period of time.
There is no escape for the bullied.
Bullying is harmful and also occurs regularly in adult teams.
We approach tackling bullying on the basis that
it's the team's turn To regain job satisfaction.
Bullying in the workplace is a taboo subject.
But once it takes place, there is much to gain.

Background information on the structure of a bullying group

What does a bullying group look like?

In a team under pressure, a hierarchical order emerges. Power differentials emerge.
Once this creates a negative mindset and the problems get bigger, common goals fall out of the picture. People come to oppose each other. Then, if no correction takes place, the team is likely to assign blame. Someone is blamed for the pain everyone feels. People start 'playing the man'.

What follows is a surviving power play with, in the end, purely losers. In a so called bullying group, this general negative process - where power and influence are at stake - has resulted in 'winners' and (future) losers. 

What bystanders see

If you ask bystanders what they see, they usually mention three roles: the bully, the followers and the victim (the scapegoat, the bullied). Sometimes they also see the team members watching silently. If one later asks the victim which of these three roles was the worst, it is often that of the silent ones: 'I had nowhere to go, everyone was laughing at me, I felt completely isolated'.

What does a bullying group look like?

Click image to enlarge...

No blame approach

Team4Teams' team coaches use a 'no blame approach'. The first thinking step in this is that people are OK, but sometimes behaviour is not. So we do not talk about a 'bully', but about 'bullying behaviour'. Actively supporting respectful behaviour is central. The focus is shifted from looking back ('Who is guilty here?') to looking forward ('What behaviour do you desire?'). The central question is how behaviour (that was once positive) can become positive again.

Sometimes a period of cooling down is needed, where people no longer feed the antagonisms. Sometimes so much resistance has developed for each other (the working relationship is 'broken') that team members first need to build new trust. Naming undesirable behaviour, and asking for positive behaviour, becomes possible once everyone is respected as a team member and valuable employee.

What causes negative peer pressure?

Behind the active disrespectful behaviour is vote buying. Getting a picture of who is guilty of this is essential. Evil speaking, intrigue, instigation: it puts pressure on everyone. The victim often has no idea how and by whom the group is pressurised to act so negatively.

Outwardly reporting what is happening ('snitching', ringing bells) will damage someone's position in the team. Because everyone gets involved in this negative group process and no one wants to be a victim themselves, it is increasingly difficult to break the spell. In the long run, no one believes it can be done at all. Absenteeism, burnout, suicide: the process can fester with which it also becomes visible outside the team. And everyone knows it: this team is no longer functioning... Harmful for everyone, not just the victim and hugely damaging for the organisation.

Where is the 'pin'?

A team with a gruff, demanding chief is in a different situation from a team where reorganisation is imminent. A group in which jealousy plays a role requires a different approach than one in which there is a struggle for power and influence. If there is unhealthy competition between employees (e.g. fighting for bonuses), this requires a different approach than a team in which there is a cultural difference, racism, or sexual harassment.

A team coach looks for the 'pin' that is piercing the soul of the team and causing the pain. That 'pin' has to come out.

What does a bullying group look like?

Positive openings

There are also positive openings in a team with bullying. Team members who show courage and dare to be vulnerable can transform a group from a survivor setting to a healthy, collaborative situation. In natural leadership, good contact with each team member is important. Identifying what the deficits are and what is needed to reduce pressure is a key focus and can thus become a positive opening.

In a team with an exclusionary attitude, nobody actually functions optimally anymore. Addressing team members on what is not going well is obvious, but it reinforces the negative exclusionary spiral. From 'excluding', a team will have to find openings to 'include' again. To then be able to see everyone's talents again. Paying attention to what does go well is another positive opening.

Those who look closely in a bullying group also see potential positive roles

Desire as a beacon

A team coach will support team members who collectively want to help build a better working atmosphere. The desire to regain job satisfaction is an excellent beacon to head for.

Giving each other space is important and goes hand in hand with healing wounds. The resistances that have piled up need to be put on the table. Behind that, a dot on the horizon then comes into view, providing new energy. Trust comes on foot; the whole process takes time.

Going into the fight hard shows someone's fear.
Daring to be vulnerable shows one's strength.

What does a bullying group look like -
view of the whole group

Those who look more broadly will discover more collaborative roles.
Is an informing team member a snitch or an informant? An informant deserves protection and support. In addition, the change process is exciting in the beginning. Anyone who wants change can only achieve it with colleagues inside and outside the team: HRM, a confidential advisor, social work, a company doctor, a supervisor.

Sometimes there is a fear culture, the flywheel spins in the wrong direction when there is fear. Those involved then easily fall back into old behaviour, employees feel they are rowing against the current. If the flywheel comes to a halt, that is already a huge victory, even though no one will experience it that way. Stagnation may give some peace, but not yet new energy. It is a matter of perseverance. No one can do this alone.

Positive roles in a bullying group how do you engage them?

What happens when an employee satisfaction survey shows a negative picture? How much influence does a manager have? What about HRM? How do doctors and caregivers behave once bullying is reported? They too can become isolated and cannot cope alone.

The Scale of Collaboration clearly shows what it takes to collaborate at a high level. You can see below the version we use in bullying groups. Teasing each other positively, playfully, mischievously and socially desirable is often a long way off. It is, however, the engine of every top team.

What roles does a team in change have

The role of an instigator, malcontent, schemer is often elusive. Yet the person filling this role needs to be seen, and asked to start contributing positively. Engage in conversation, ask for his or her help to become a collaborative group. Teach each other what helps in doing so. Stopping bullying is the right way forward, but it is not enough. Practising new positive behaviour and persevering is the message.

What can you do against workplace bullying?

A group in transition

Positive versus negative roles

One recognises 'natural leadership' in people who dare to stop undesirable behaviour. "That's enough now!" "Stop that!" "Can it be more positive? They show guts, can take a threshold and deploy their positive attitude.
They inspire a team. If the flywheel is spinning in the wrong direction, the role is missing or fails to come to fruition. Sometimes a person is alternately positive and angry and influential in both cases. Sometimes it is an influential subgroup.

We see the informant as the most positive role in a bullying group. However, this role is vulnerable and therefore deserves support.

Finally, there are the silencers. They stand by, allow the negative behaviour and sometimes laugh along. Besides silencers, there are also team members who consistently walk away as soon as the atmosphere takes a negative direction. They feel powerless, do not want to be involved in the negative actions and so walk away.

How do you distinguish positive and evil roles?

Manager

In the picture above, the manager is placed in a collaborative and influential position. This is an ideal situation. However, we see much more often that managers struggle to transform negative behaviour. In fact, they then find themselves with the silent or absent group. Sometimes the manager is involved in negative behaviour. Managers may feel powerless and be victims themselves.

Phase by phase -
give me back my job satisfaction

Not only positive roles play a role in a transition. Once undesirable behaviour is brought to the table in a team, there will also be moments of confusion at first. The group denies, pressure focuses on a group member. A blaming counterproductive atmosphere develops, influential team members disinform (malign). The victim shows survivor behaviour and is unable to function properly. This negative behaviour is often not well understood by colleagues, social workers, HRM and a supervisor. "The victim himself makes it look like it" is a common comment.

People who inform see the bullying behaviour, but often do not acutely see its instigating source. Moreover, a bullying group is a tangle of mounting resistances, recriminations and accusations, where no one sees the root or cause, the original problem, anymore.

For a team coach, it does not make much sense to stir into 'what is going on'. Looking for underlying causes does matter. Where is the 'pin' causing the pain?

Gains on all fronts

Even though it is complex, tackling bullying at work pays off. A professional approach delivers flexibility, creativity, willingness to change and job satisfaction. Employees feel like it again: 'I got my job satisfaction back!"

No group is the same, there is no one approach that works everywhere. A team coaching programme usually lasts six months. An intensive start is followed by short implementation sessions that decrease in intensity. Once team members alternately show natural leadership, the group can again do it by itself.

Standing up can and does help